Thursday, December 18, 2008

The Thirteen Days of Christmas

Special time didn't work out as planned for Offspring #3. The stomach pain, the cramping was so horrible and I was sure someone had drugged me with Imodium again somehow. We were supposed to go to the zoo together (sounds innocent, but my offspring know how to turn anything into a nightmare), but I spent hours in the bathroom with him pounding on the door screaming, "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!! IT'S MY TURN!!!!! WHEN ARE WE GOING TO THE ZOO?!!!! WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN WHEN!!!!!!!! MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!! YOU PROMISED!!! I WANT TO SEE THE HOWLER MONKEYS!!!! HURRY MOM!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

Times that by five hours. I begged my mother (the worst mother in the world) to drive me back to the hospital, but she didn't believe me. I sat on the toilet cramping horribly. Ohhhhhh, the cramping. I thought my last bout with constipation was horrible, but this was 10 times worse! I cried and strained, threw-up, cried some more, strained for probably a couple hours to have a bowel movement, but the only thing that moved was ........












MORE OFFSPRING!!!!!!!!!



OOOOOOOOOOOHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSH!!!!

A little memento from my not so darling husband to remember him by. I should've guessed with my mother (the worst mother in the world) telling me how fat I am much more often than usual. I haven't even named the other 12 yet! It's too hard. Offspring #5 says the baby has my legs. Hardy har har. Maybe this one will like me a little.

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